Tag: caregiving
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One step forward, two steps back
Visiting my dad in the care home is a mix of quiet miracles and heartbreak. Dementia shifts constantly – progress one day, confusion the next. He said my name, something I haven’t heard in so long. I carry that small moment with me, even as everything else keeps slipping away.
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Walking, wandering & dementia
When dementia took my father’s ability to walk, it marked the loss of more than movement – it was the end of our shared rambles, his independence, and a lifetime of direction. This reflection traces his journey from avid walker to wheelchair, and the emotional terrain we now navigate as a family.
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Father’s Day
Father’s Day felt hollow without my dad at the table – he’s back in the care home after a fall and hospital stay. Watching other families with grandfathers stung. I miss his quiet wisdom, his help, his presence. Even everyday problems remind me of what we’ve lost, piece by piece.
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What I wish I’d known: reflections for Dementia Action Week
During Dementia Action Week, I reflect on the journey of coping with a loved one’s dementia. Dementia is different for everyone, but it’s important to share memories while you can, seek support, and remember the power of simple presence. I also share some resources that I have found useful.
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Thinking about loss and dementia
I visit my father at the care home, grappling with the complicated emotions of being unable to care for him full-time due to his dementia. I think about the questions that have been raised by his nurse about the end of his life and hold onto moments of connection with him.
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Why we need to stop turning away from dementia
I reflect on turning 40 and my father’s struggle with dementia, emphasising societal stigmas surrounding the condition. I critique the politicisation of dementia and advocate for greater understanding and inclusion of those affected. There are enduring connections beyond memory loss, and we need more empathy and community support.
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He’s in a care home now
I reflect on the challenges of placing a loved one with dementia in a care home after a lengthy hospital stay. Although initially heartbroken, I recognise the comfort my father feels there despite the emotional pain of separation. This difficult reality seems particularly hard to accept at Christmas.
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Books about a parent with dementia
I was surprised when I realised how few books or blogs I could find that reflected the experience of what it is to have a parent with dementia. Here are three books that brought me a better understanding of what has been happening and made me feel less alone.
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Visiting hours: going to see my father when he was in hospital last summer
I wrote this last summer when my father was in hospital after a fall. He couldn’t come home because he kept trying to pull off the neck brace he had to wear, so he ended up spending months there until we managed to get him into a care home.
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The sandwich generation: between young children and a father with dementia
I reflect on my father’s dementia, how it happened gradually and then suddenly. This is a post I wrote about a year ago, when he was still living at home and my son hadn’t started school yet. I felt trapped between caring responsibilities for my children and father.
dementia in the family 